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Category Archives: Weddings
Party At The Pink Pig
Jules and Bree, the latest in a long line of ladies coming up from Florida to wed.
Our plan (after some unintended gender confusion on my part), was to meet in Essex, NY at the ferry dock for the ceremony.
However, in early November, it can be – and yesterday absolutely was – rather brisk at the ferry dock! Not only was I concerned for these gals who’d just left 80 degrees and sunny behind them, but for ME. Even with climate change, in my personal experience, the winters somehow just keep getting colder!
Fortunately, I’d arrived in Essex a little early and found myself getting tea at an adorable coffee shop and Cool Stuff Store called The Pink Pig.
Deb, the proprietress extraordinaire (and Manhattan expat), was incredibly friendly and welcoming. When I told her I was in town for a wedding at the ferry dock, she said she wanted to come and take photos for her blog. So, I suspected that if we showed up on her doorstep, she would welcome our little wedding party with open arms.
And so she did!
She rearranged some of her nifty antiques and other lifestyle ornaments to make room for us to do the ceremony, changed the music playing in the store, and took a heap of photos – including the entire wedding party with their friends Lee Ann and Courtney from Plattsburgh. Deb also gave them a couple of coffee mugs as impromptu wedding gifts!
If you, dear reader, are ever in Essex, NY, go visit Deb at The Pink Pig. She’s open year round. Be sure to show her some gleeful and abundant love!
I also got to learn more about Jules and Bree, who met playing pool. Apparently, Bree’s parents didn’t like the woman she’d been seeing, and so suggested she get out more and join a lesbian pool league. Definitely a guaranteed bastion of fine, upstanding citizens!
Apparently, Bree’s Dad is also THE biggest redneck in town, and approached Jules at one point, asking if she was dating his daughter. Fearing getting her butt kicked, but determined to stand up for herself, she acknowledged that she was. Dad gave a nod and a grunt and walked away. And all their parents have been on board with the relationship ever since!
This morning, I got the most beautiful email from Jules and Bree which, though a little long for a blog post, I want to share in its entirety because it was so moving:
Kathryn, Bree and I just wanted to take a few moments to thank you so much for making today a very special day for us. Bree and I have said for the last couple of years that if and or when getting married would have a legal effect on our lives we would jump at the opportunity. When the federal government, namely the IRS, made the decision, to recognize same sex couples as married any where in the country as long as you were married in a State where it was legal we could not pass up the opportunity to get married. Then the enormity of the task at hand began to take shape…what state, how do the laws work, who will marry us, will they marry us? How long will we have to be gone. As we had discussed today we have been together for almost 5 years we own a home, have a few pets. Bree is self employed runs a very successful landscaping business and I am a classically and formally trained Chef who five years ago redirected my career and sought some more education in Clinical Nutrition and I now am a Regional Food Service Director for one of the largest Behavioral Healthcare Organizations in the United States and being away from our jobs is not easy for either of us. Honestly, it was not until we found you on line that, marry each other became a realistic and reachable goal. On the outside looking in today may have appeared to be a nice ceremony for two women in a quaint little cafe, called the Pink Pig, by the water in Essex. Please know, that for Bree, and I, today was a true commitment to each other, based on a culmination events in the last year, that reaffirmed our almost 5 year love affair. Our Marriage today also provides Bree and I with some basic rights and privileges that without your help, and the State of New York, we would not have, and for that we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. With Warmest Regards, Jules and Bree SmithI love my job!
Brain Gone Wrong
I recently got an email from a couple – Jules and Bree – who were coming to upstate New York from Florida to get married. Having just seen their names, I assumed that they were both men.
When we finally spoke on the phone, Jules, who came across as a totally regular, easygoing guy, kept referring to Bree as “her.” I assumed he was using that pronoun in kind of a campy way. I’ve spent most of my life in the theater, so in the moment that seemed like a reasonable assumption.
Then, I started wondering if maybe Bree was transsexual or transgender, and I wanted to be sure about exactly how she was identifying. So I asked what pronouns and other language they wanted to use in the ceremony.
Jules said, “Oh, yeah, wife and wife will be fine.”
At which point I realized that I was talking to two WOMEN, one of whom just happened to have a rather low voice and casual, dude-like demeanor!
Fortunately, when I confessed and apologized for my confusion, they were both incredibly good natured about it, and sent me a pic so I’d know who was who.
The plan was that they’d come drive from Plattsburgh, I’d take the ferry over from Charlotte, and we’d all meet in Essex, NY at the ferry dock. We’d do the ceremony looking out over the water, and then roll along with our respective days. An easy and relaxed Friday afternoon.
And how did it go? Stay tuned for more information…
October Surprise
So the other day, I get this random text:
Alice and Terri are a couple of gals from Florida who’ve been together for years, and, like so many other women I’ve been working with of late, decided to take advantage of the demise of DOMA and come get married in Vermont.
Apparently, they’d been at the Avis counter at the airport, and when they mentioned that they were here to get married, another couple of women in line, Susan and Gwen, said that they were getting married too, and one thing led to another, and they discovered that they were all getting married by me, and that their cakes was being made by my friend, neighbor, and colleague Julie Almond of Caketopia Cakes. Lucky gals.
This is Julie. She’s a genius. No, really.
She’s a member of MENSA.
So, I go up to the Comstock Inn in Plainfield to marry Alice and Terri first. I’d spent the morning helping Julie get their cake ready, and boy is it exquisite. Spice cake with maple buttercream frosting, and then bedecked with this totally gorgeous sugar art! I painted some of the flowers. But really, mostly, I washed Julie’s dishes. It’s still an honor.
The gals dress up, we do the ceremony, and they’re happily hitched:
And THEN they tell me they’re planning to come to my house a few days later for Susan and Gwen’s wedding. And so they do.
Photo by Lindsay Raymondjack
Susan and Gwen are from Tennessee, and are also having a Dumping DOMA Elopement. And what might have been a quiet little wedding at my house did, in fact, turn into a party. A Tea Party! The good kind.
Photo by Lindsay Raymondjack
Of course no wedding around here is complete without a Julie Almond Cake Bomb of Gustatory Bliss. This one was a brownie cake with buttercream frosting. Good God! Or as Frank Zappa might say, “Great googly moogly!” The thing was TO DIE FOR!!!!
Photo by Lindsay Raymondjack.
Cake by Caketopia Cakes.
It had so much buttery, chocolately goodness that…well… Honestly, this cake could bring about world peace. Seriously. If people ate enough of this stuff, they’d be in too much of a happy sugar coma to ever fight with anyone again. That is, of course, until the cake ran out…
Anyway, welcome to Vermont, where this kind of thing happens all the time.
A Wedding Of Unusual Coincidences
Today was a wedding I was looking forward to: Angela and James from Rhode Island. They decided to get married in Vermont because they both grew up here and fell in love here; and as much as they enjoy living in Providence, it felt special to come back to the Green Mountains to say The Dos.
When they first contacted me, they said they’d be making a film in an apple orchard for their ceremony. This sounded nothing but intriguing. I couldn’t wait. However, it proved a little too complex for their schedule, so they decided to get married at a coffee shop instead – specifically Muddy Waters, a dark, cozy place with a very handmade feel. In fact, from the inside, it kind of looks like it grew there, rather than got built.
When I drove into town, I was a little unsure about where I might find parking, even on a quiet Sunday afternoon. But, much to my surprise, there was one spot available on a very coveted, and usually packed, block of Main Street – right in front of Muddy Waters!
I walked in and immediately picked out Angela and James, who looked just like they were ready for a funky coffeeshop wedding. And they really wanted it right there. In the booth.
James, Sculptor and Angela, Bar Manager
I sat down and we started chatting while waiting for the photographer. They were hilarious. I’d love to move to Providence and hang out with them all the time. Then, another Happy Coincidence occurred.
I am not psychic. I do not claim to be psychic. However, when it comes to weddings I do have inexplicably good sartorial karma. While I ask most couples what their wedding colors are, and work hard to wear something that goes with the color scheme, sometimes I don’t ask – and end up picking exactly the right thing anyway. I showed up once for a wedding of two women at Shelburne Farms. For no particular reason, I wore a bright orange dress, and it turned out one of the brides was wearing a dress EXACTLY the same color. This happens a lot.
Today, I did something I would never normally do for a wedding. I threw on a pair of fishnets. Over orange tights, no less. I didn’t even know I had this pair of fishnets until I started digging through my basket of tights. But I knew that Angela and James were probably pretty non-traditional, and it would likely work well with whatever they had going on.
Turns out Angela was also wearing fishnets.
Legs!
SO! Then the photographers show up – Monica and Judd from Eve Event Photography. I worked with them a few years ago at the wedding of Amber and Kara, and the petals banner at the top of this website is a detail from a photo they took of that ceremony:
Petals. Lots and lots of petals.
It also happens that I use the petals banner at the top of the page when I print out a copy of the ceremony to give to my couples. Monica saw the text of the ceremony and said, “Hey! I recognize that photo!” I’d completely forgotten the connection until she said it. Thankfully, she was fine with (and kind of tickled by) my using the detail that way.
Hey! I recognize that photo!
Finally, after a great deal of beer, we launched into the ceremony. Right there at the table. Hopefully Monica and Judd got some good shots that they’ll pass along. We used my standard ceremony, with just one little tweak. They weren’t exchanging rings. Right after the ceremony, they were going over to Yankee Tattoo to get rings inked onto their fingers instead. Most people intend to get married for life, but I have to say that an ink tattoo is definitely a serious commitment!
“It really is a small world! I’m still going to buy lotto tickets…
Thank you so much, yesterday was pretty much perfect.”
Anyway, a memorable afternoon with two really fun couples. I’d make weddings with these folks any old time!
P.S. I posted about this little event on my Facebook page and a friend wrote in immediately:
And then I found the original post:
I love Vermont.
Greetings From The North Country
Emily and Jeremy are living in Alaska right now (hence the obligatory gorgeous Husky), but got married in Vermont because it’s her home state. Hence the state-specific cake topper:
Their ceremony took place at a farm in Ira, Vermont, just outside of West Rutland. The first weekend in October is generally high leaf season across the state, and October 5, 2013 was no different. Cloudy, to be sure, but no less fabulous in sexy, brilliant leafyosity.
Their ceremony was such an exquisite example of how simple a ceremony can be. You get the right location, a tent, some hay bales to sit on, and some talented caterers, and you’ve got yourself an occasion to remember.
For anyone stressing about the cost of getting married, and the fear that they have to have an overwhelming blowout extravaganza to make their Big Day memorable, Emily and Jeremy offered up a perfect example of how basic elements can lead to utter perfection.
A Baker’s Almost Dozen
Lorianna and Scott came up from Oklahoma to get married at the Birch Ridge Inn in Killington (very, very close to where the Elf Princess and the Marlboro Man got hitched). When I asked them why Vermont, they said, basically, because they’d never been here before and wanted an adventure!
They told me they’d been together over 11 years, and that they’d first met at work. Lorianna thought Scott was pretty cute, but wanted a “legitimate” way to get to know him. So she started a Film Club, just so that there’d be a way to suss him out in a non-suspicious manner. Very clever.
When I asked why it took them over 11 years to get married, they said that they’re both pretty independent people and that they were just waiting for the right time. Which says to me that when it comes to relationships, nothing HAS to be any way. We should all get exactly the relationship we want, according to our nature and needs.
And, oh, by the way, I know this isn’t at all about my sartorial choices, but check out these awesome red shoes I found! SCORE!
She Of The Woods
Sylvia (whose name means “She of the Woods”) and Dan got married on some wooded property overlooking Lake Champlain in the New North End of Burlington, just behind the former Catholic Archdiocese.
I had no idea about the network of trails running along the bluff, but apparently it’s a popular mountain-biking spot.
This is where they’d gone on their first date, and where he proposed, so it seemed highly appropriate for them to be getting married there.
It was a scorchingly hot day in the mid-90s, but sweet and cool in the trees. Â I felt like I was performing a ceremony for Titania and Oberon.
This is why performing weddings in Vermont is so much fun. Â There’s always lovely people and always gorgeous places to support them in their love.
The Elf Princess and The Marlboro Man
Rebekah and Alex contacted me to perform their wedding ceremony on a giant block of granite overlooking Route 4 in Killington.
They’d hiked up to this promontory on their very first date, and were now coming back up the trail with her brother Matt, his fiancee Grace, and me to solemnize their vows. Barefoot – I might add.
Still snow on the ground? Â No problem! Â As Matt put it, “She’s an Elf Princess. Â He’s the Marlboro Man. Â They don’t need shoes!”
We got to the top in about 30 minutes. Â It was a gorgeous, bright, breezy, early spring day. The kind of day which makes you believe anything is possible. Â A perfect day to get married. Â Alex and Rebekah kept climbing.
And decided they’d found the exact spot where they wanted to speak their vows.
We followed them up, and performed the ceremony. Grace had a surprise reading, a poem she said made her first believe in the power and possibility of love. Â It was the last part of “Little Gidding” from T.S. Eliot’s Four Quartets. Â Which, by the way, always makes me cry:
With the drawing of this Love and the voice of this
CallingWe shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
Through the unknown, unremembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness
Between two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always—
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.
Then there was champagne and toasting! 
And great good wishes expressed by all the other, more geared-up hikers passing through.
I’ve been fortunate enough to perform weddings in all manner of magical places, but honestly, this was a spot that made you believe you could fly – or at the very least, have an extremely successful marriage!
Pike’s Peek
Debra and Michelle
My friend, photographer Karen Pike (all these photos are hers) hooked me up with Debra and Michelle, a couple of lovely gals up from Texas to get married in muddy Vermont! Â They ended up coming out to my house for the ceremony and photo shoot, and had a really fun time – complete with tiny cake from neighbor (and Cake Genius) Julie Almond of Caketopia Cakes.
Julie Almond‘s very, very tasty vanilla/strawberry cakelet.
What I hadn’t realized was that it was the 4th anniversary of Vermont legalizing same sex marriage! Â What a joy to be part of a state that has its head on straight about human rights!
But I’ll let Karen tell the rest of the story on her fine blog…